LETTING GO

This from some musings about change:

I have come to realize that a critical element of change is learning to let go of that which is familiar and comfortable.

Sometimes change cannot occur without this letting.  While all of my focus recently has been on getting rid of the accumulated “stuff” in my life, which occasionally borders on the excessive, the real work is recognizing the shifting needs, dreams, and aspirations that create the fabric of my interior life and define who I am, or at least who I want to be.

I wanted to be a physician…and became one

I wanted to be an artist…and became one

I want to be a writer...?

It has occurred to me that letting go of the “stuff” that has accumulated in my studio over these many years, will be more difficult than letting go of how I see and define myself.

Something's gotta give

YOU WOULD THINK THAT BY NOW...

I would be comfortable with the unpredictability of an art income, but to my dismay, I am not. Living on a fixed retirement income, that depends on the enhancement by sales of my art, does not allow that., and whenever the sales slow down or disappear completely stress levels go off the scale. But experience has shown that my art has never failed me, and just when I think I am about to “go under” one or more sales are registered and I live to paint another day.

Since the beginning of the year my sales have been almost non-existent and I was embarking in a major self pity party. I was ready to cancel my trip home and go apply for a job as a greeter at WalMart. (I chose to let my medical license lapse...I refused to have it as a crutch!). In spite of my past experiences, I just knew that this time it was going be different...I would have swallow my pride and admit defeat.

But, first the call from an art consultant in NYC to tell me they sold one of my clay mono types. Then the email from someone in Italy named Renzulli -no relative- wanting to purchase one of my paintings she saw on my web site. This was followed by a call from my dear friend Harvey who just sold one of my paintings in Gallery 5 and had another pending. And it didn’t end there. One of my pieces went out on approval at SW Gallery in Philadelphia, and when I checked my phone messages yesterday there were two galleries calling to buy my prints.

Why am I posting this? Because if sing about the good times, then I don’t feel so bad crying about the bad times :-). Seriously, I guess it just to acknowledge that I am a very slow learner, and there is no assurance that with the next down turn I won’t be singing the same sad, worrisome song. But for now...all is well and my rose colored glasses are firmly in place.

And it’s good to be home.


Be it ever so humble, there is no place like your studio.